Essay 4 Reflection

     After reading the comments I received, I started to get more specific details in my writing.  I started by adding to my thesis. I added what I wrote about specifically in my piece for benefits.  I made sure the thesis said everything I would talk about in the writing. I also worked on finding better sources.  My research was very general and vague. I found two sources on the online database that had more specific information.  I took out the websites that didn’t have good information and replaced them with the better sources. This helps strengthen the evidence in my writing.  I also added in my in-text citations which I forgot to do on the rough draft. Another thing I fixed was my final paragraph. I realized that is was very repetitive.  I tried to cut down on the repetition so I could focus on the point I was trying to get across. Overall, I made my writing more specific informational. I also fixed up my in-text citations and my sources.

 

Essay 4-Final Draft

     Attleboro is a great place to live.  The community is very active. Attleboro residents often give their input on how the city works and how to improve it.  They have recently shown interest in building a dog park. Many people in Attleboro have dogs. However, Attleboro does not have many dog parks or places for dogs to run.  In downtown Attleboro, buildings are built close together. There are a lot of apartments and small houses. This doesn’t give dogs a lot of space to run. Many dog owners are forced to walk their dogs on the side of the road which is unsafe.  Recently, the city bought a local golf course. The land is very spacious, but the city hasn’t decided what to do with it yet. If the city were to use this land to build a dog park, the space would be used effectively. The dogs in our community would have a  safe and healthy place to run around. This dog park could also help the residents meet new people and connect with others in Attleboro. Additionally, dogs will be more active and have a safe place to play.

     Dog parks have a lot of benefits for dogs. The parks can help dogs develop their physical and social skills.  Research has found that “ Proper play helps to develop your dog’s coordination, [and] timing (and the) skills.”(Allen 107)  These skills can be improved at a dog park where dogs can run around and play. This would make a big difference in Attleboro.  A lot of owners don’t have a large enough area for their dogs to exercise. The parks can also help dogs to stay safe. Many dog owners in Attleboro do not have a backyard for their pets to play. They end up walking their dogs on the side of the road.  This is unsafe for dogs because they could be hit by oncoming traffic and get seriously injured. A new dog park would give owners a place to let their dogs exercise and develop skills in a safe environment.

     Dog parks help dogs, but they can also help communities.  The parks can help communities come together and socialize.  Many people will go to the park, which will allow the community to connect with other dog lovers.  A study conducted by Graham and Glover found that “ participants experienced dog parks through their pet.”(Graham/Glover 223)  Dog owners had the same experiences as their dogs in the park. If dogs make new friends, owners make new friends too. The dog park will also benefit the community in other ways. When dogs socialize together, they often become less violent.  This may lower the chance of dogs attacking others. Adding a dog park will give the community a place to socialize and it will help to protect its residents.

     Building a dog park in Attleboro would be sensible not just for the benefits, but also because of the available land.  The city of Attleboro recently bought a local golf course. The course consists of “93 acres of gently rolling, pristine land in the center of the city.”(Rhodes)  This environment is perfect for dogs. There is lots of green grass for dogs to run and the facility is fenced in. The city could add some playgrounds for the dogs and then it would be complete.  The golf course is also right in the middle of the city. All the residents will be able to easily access the facility. There have been discussions about building houses on the golf course. A Florida real estate agent has been interested in flattening this beautiful land into apartments. (Stockwell)  The area has lots of hills and bumps because it was a former golf course. It is filled with vibrant colors and it would take a lot of extra effort to flatten out the land. Although the agent was interested in the land, our city bought the land to preserve its beauty for the community. This beauty will benefit all of Attleboro.

     Other cities have built dog parks to benefit their communities.  Dayton, a city in Washington, started to go through the approval process in 2017.  When they started the approval, The area had already been landscaped and grass has been planted. (Ver Valen)  This is very similar to Attleboro’s situation because our landscape does not need a lot of work either. There are many trees and hills on the golf course.  One of Dayton’s biggest expenses was the fencing. Dayton spent approximately $3,500 in order to buy and install 780 feet of fencing. (Ver Valen) Dayton built a dog park for their community. In Attleboro, the golf course already has fencing.  This expense has already been paid. Dayton did very well building the dog park. Attleboro would also benefit from a dog park at a lower cost. Our city will improve, like Dayton, if we support this plan.

     Our community would benefit greatly by building a dog park.  Dogs will become healthier and the community will connect with others.  The benefits of the park are endless and it is a unique opportunity for Attleboro.  The green grass from the golf course fills the land with color. The hills create a natural landscape.  The property is fenced in which removes a large cost for the city. A new dog park would be beneficial for the dogs and residents of Attleboro.  Additionally, the land is available now. Building a new dog park will make Attleboro an even greater place to live and connect with the community.




Works Cited



Allen, Laurel. “Dog Parks: Benefits and Liabilities.” ScholarlyCommons, 29 May 2007, repository.upenn.edu/mes_capstones/18/.

Graham, Taryn and Troy Glover. “On the Fence: Dog Parks in the (Un)Leashing of Community and Social Capital.” Leisure Sciences, vol. 36, no. 3, May/Jun2014, pp. 217-234. EBSCOhost, doi:10.1080/01490400.2014.888020.

Rhodes, George W. “Attleboro Mayor Seeks Volunteers for Committee on Highland Country Club.” The Sun Chronicle, 2 July 2018, www.thesunchronicle.com/news/local_news/attleboro-mayor-seeks-volunteers-for-committee-on-highland-country-club/article_60ea1ea5-3797-5ab0-95a7-42e215603f63.html.

Stockwell, Mark. “Our View: Keeping Highland Was Right Move.” The Sun Chronicle, 27 June 2018, www.thesunchronicle.com/opinion/our-view-keeping-highland-was-right-move/article_761b194b-1724-54da-bdf7-cf42c08f4f84.html.

 

Ver Valen, Dian. “Dayton Looks to More Dog-Friendly Future.” Walla Walla Union-Bulletin (WA), 08 Jan. 2017. EBSCOhost, bristolcc.edu:2048/login?url=http://search.ebscohost.com/login.aspx?direct=true&db=nfh&AN=2W62792895612&site=ehost-live.

 

Peer Review 4

I like how you start off your piece with a general overview of dog parks.  It helps to set the tone of your writing. I could tell what your thesis was and it was in a good spot, however, it wasn’t very clear.  You should talk about how adding a dog park to your city would have specific benefits in your city. You should also add the problems the dog park would solve in the beginning.  When you talk about how building a dog park would prevent waste from being left around, there isn’t a clear explanation. You should go into more detail on how the dog park solves that problem.  There was a lot of benefits that you talked about for the dog park. I would try to explain how those benefits help improve your community. Also, the paragraphs are grouped well, but you should move some paragraphs.  The paragraphs about dog benefits next to each other and community benefits next to each other. Your sources were good and they seemed credible. If I were to add any sources, I would look to your local paper. Try to find talk of dog parks or talk about bringing the community together.  You could talk about how a dog park would help bring your community together. The works cited and in-text citations look good. If you add a local source, it could help to bring in more support. You have a well detailed rough draft. Strengthening your thesis and organizing your writing a little more will really help your piece to improve.

Essay 3 Reflection

     After reading my comments for Essay three I did revisions.  I started by looking into the research page my professor had recommended I look at.  I read about how to properly cite sources and how to find credible sources. I went back to all of my sources to recheck and make sure they were all credible.  I also fixed up the in-text citations for my sources.

 

     Another revision I made was with my introduction.  I realized my ideas weren’t organized well and I split up the paragraph.  I made two separate paragraphs because the ideas in them were different. A third aspect of my writing was an overall revision.  After reading through my writing a few times I realized everything was very wordy. I went back and tried to cut out repetition and trim down long sentences.  This helped my writing become easier to understand and simpler to follow. Overall, I tried to touch up my citations and make my writing easier to follow.

 

Essay 3-Final Draft

     Children learn through play.  They can develop, grow, and have fun at the playground.  Playgrounds are places all children love. While playing children are physically active, communicating with others, and socially engaged.  The time spent on the playground is necessary for children. This playtime can jumpstart their education.

      We need to build new and more modernized playgrounds in our city.  It will help children increase their activity and social skills. There are many benefits of a modernized playground.  The new modernized playground is called a zoned playground.

     Zoned playgrounds are different than regular playgrounds because of how they are set up.  The playground equipment is put into sections based on motor skills. A playground was built in Italy with three zones- manuality, mobility, and balance.  A study was conducted to observe the zoned playground. This study found that children who regularly attended the playground, “ improved significantly in four out of six gross motor tasks.”(Tortella 12)  If we build more zoned playgrounds, children in our area may experience the same improvements. These zones help children improve their skills in focused and different ways.

     Zone playgrounds also increase children’s general physical activity.  When children are more active they become healthier. This helps to prevent them from any diseases or injuries that could hold the children back.  A study by Jillian Barnas was conducted on how effective zoned playgrounds were compared to traditional playgrounds. The study found that “children participating in very active behavior increased on ZP(zoned playgrounds) versus TP(traditional playgrounds) by 10% .”(Barnas 129) This increase shows how zoned playgrounds can be effective.  If we build more zoned playgrounds in the city, we could have more active children. Higher activity will make children healthier and ready to learn.

     Zoned playgrounds have many more benefits than traditional playgrounds.  However, there are benefits that all playgrounds have on children. Some researchers have observed these benefits by using a social-ecological model.  This model by Brendon Hyndman is “exploring the multiple levels of influence [and] provides a useful framework for understanding it.”(Hyndman 327) The social-ecological model helped to determine that influences like intrapersonal, interpersonal, and the environment have effects on children. (Hyndman)  Building more playgrounds in the city would help children engage in more rigorous activity, improve social interactions, and increase awareness of their surroundings. The positive effects of playgrounds are overwhelming and we should take the opportunity to build more playgrounds around the city for our children.

     Playgrounds help increase activity levels in children.  Playgrounds have been found to decrease sedentary time. This is because children like to run, jump, and climb at the playground.  Another study observed children and their sedentary time. Researchers found that “the intervention [of playgrounds] was effective in displacing sedentary time in younger children.”(Hamer 6)  This decrease in sedentary time is another benefit playgrounds have on children. More playgrounds will help our children remain active and become healthier.

       Playgrounds can help children improve their social skills.  They can prepare children for real-life situations. When playing in a playground, “the kids themselves have to negotiate, well, what are we going to do in this game? What are the rules we are going to follow?” (Pellis)  Situations like these help children solve problems. It teaches them how to communicate, cooperate, and compromise. Building more playgrounds will help teach children these valuable life lessons. If we build more playgrounds, children will be ready to solve problems independently.

     Playgrounds are places where children are actively learning.  Studies have shown that zoned playgrounds are the most beneficial for children.  They increase physical activity, social interactions, and communication. Building zoned playgrounds will help our children to develop and learn in a more focused environment.  This design develops specific physical and social skills. All children will become confident, healthy problem solvers with zoned playgrounds in our city.




Works Cited



Tortella, Patrizia, et al. “Motor Skill Development in Italian Pre-School Children Induced by Structured Activities in a Specific Playground.” Plos ONE, vol. 11, no. 7, 27 July 2016, pp. 1-15. EBSCOhost, doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0160244.

 

This article is about a study done on children at the “La Ghirada” sports Center in Italy.  The study focused on observing how children’s motor skills improved in the zoned style playground.  The study found that the playground improved the majority of motor skills for children. This source is credible because it is a recent study and the writer conducted their own research.  The information isn’t incorrect or changed because it is the study was conducted by the author.



Hyndman, Brendon, et al. “Exploring the Influences on Children’s School Playground Activities.” American Journal of Play, vol. 8, no. 3, Spring2016, pp. 325-344. EBSCOhost

 

This article explores how the social-ecological model influences children’s playground activities.  It explores how different influences can affects children’s activity. They found if the interpersonal influences and physical environments are healthy and plentiful, children will be more active in playgrounds.  This source is credible because it used a lot of different references. All the references used in this article help to make sure the information is correct because some references will backup the other references.



Hamer, Mark, et al. “Effect of Major School Playground Reconstruction on Physical Activity and Sedentary Behaviour: Camden Active Spaces.” BMC Public Health, vol. 17, 07 June 2017, pp. 1-8. EBSCOhost, doi:10.1186/s12889-017-4483-5.

 

This journal article is about a study on children’s physical activities.  There were seven total schools in the study that were observed. The findings of the study were that playgrounds don’t make a big difference in physical activity, but they do decrease sedentary time in smaller children.  This source is credible because it is based on the author’s observations. It doesn’t just state factual evidence. The source also uses references to compare its work to and to see if their work was similar to others.




Barnas, Jillian, et al. “In the Zone: An Investigation into Physical Activity during Recess on Traditional Versus Zoned Playgrounds.” Physical Educator, vol. 75, no. 1, Jan. 2018, pp. 116-137. EBSCOhost, doi:10.18666/TPE-2018-V75-I1-7594.

This article observes if a zoned playground worked better than a traditional playground.  The study collects its on data to come to its conclusions. It concludes that both playgrounds are effective, but zoned playgrounds are more effective.  This source is credible because it collects its own data and then compares it to other data. The source acknowledges its limitations and uses references to back up the conclusions even more.




Hamilton, Jon, and Sergio Pellis. “Scientists Say Child’s Play Helps Build A Better Brain.” NPR, NPR, 6 Aug. 2014, www.npr.org/sections/ed/2014/08/06/336361277/scientists-say-childs-play-helps-build-a-better-brain.

This source is a website with a news article on playgrounds.  The article talks about a scientist and all the research he has done on the topic.  He has found free play activities like playgrounds help children develop complex social interactions and other skills.  This source is credible because it is a news source talking to a scientists. Both parties have no bias towards playgrounds because they are just trying to find or convey observations.



Essay 4

     Attleboro Massachusetts is a great place to live.  The community is very outspoken. Everyone wants to give their input on how the city work and how to improve it.  One problem I’ve noticed lately is related to dogs. It seems everyone in Attleboro has a dog. This is has created a problem.  Attleboro doesn’t have many dog parks or places for dogs to run. The outskirts of Attleboro are less condensed which gives dogs more space to run around.  However, Many dog owners let their dogs use the bathroom on anyone’s lawn. This kills the grass and creates ugly dead spots. Many of my neighbors and friends are very familiar with this problem.  In downtown Attleboro, buildings are built close together. There are a lot of apartments and small houses. This doesn’t give dogs a lot of space to run. Many dog owners are forced to walk their dogs on the side of the road which is unsafe.  The city recently bought a recently bankrupt golf course. The land is very spacious, but the city hasn’t decided what to do with it yet. If the city were to build a dog park, the community would be a lot happier. Their dogs would have a place to run around and homeowners lawns wouldn’t get ruined.  Building a dog park over the old golf course will help improve the communities feelings about dogs even more.

         Dog parks have a lot of positive benefits for dogs.  When dogs meet other dogs they can become healthier and more behaved.  Research has found that “one of the main reasons dogs display behavioral problems is because they are not getting enough exercise.”  Dog parks can help dogs to be more active and become healthier. This would make a big difference in Attleboro because a lot of owners don’t have a safe place to let their dogs exercise.  The parks can also help dogs to become better trained. In many dog parks there are, “areas where you can train your dog, improving his behavior even more.” The training area helps the dog to improve their skills and become better behaved.  This will help dog owners that don’t live near open areas. Their dogs won’t tear up their shoes or eat at furniture to burn off energy.

         Dog parks help dogs, but they can also help communities.  The parks can help communities come together and socialize.  Many people will go to the park which is “allowing owners to meet people and navigate space through their pets.”  The community can connect through a shared interest of dogs. Members of the city will be able to meet new people and create friends in a relaxed and comfortable environment.  The dog park will also benefit the community in other ways. Neighbors won’t be mad at dog owners for ruining their grass and dogs will be better behaved. There will be a smaller chance of dogs attacking others.  Dog parks can help protect your community “by offering a secure area for dogs to play and socialize, without getting in the way of others.” When dogs socialize together, they become less violent. Building a safe place for dogs to interact will help stop dogs from hurting members of the city and it will protect dogs from getting injured.  Adding a dog park will help the community become closer and it will help to protect its citizens.

         Building a dog park in Attleboro would be perfect not just for the benefits, but also because of the available land.  The city of Attleboro recently bought a bankrupt golf course. The course consists of “93 acres of gently rolling, pristine land in the center of the city.”  This environment is perfect for dogs. There is lots of green grass for dogs to run and the facility is fenced in. They would just need to add some playgrounds for dogs and it would be done.  The golf course is also right in the middle of the city. This is good because all the residents will be able to easily access the facility. There has been some talk of building housing over the golf course but this doesn’t make sense. The local paper stated, “The alternative [was] allowing a Florida real estate developer to build homes on the property.”  This is too big of a risk. The area is has a lot of hills and bumps because it used to be a golf course. This would take a lot of extra effort to flatten out. Also, the area is already filled with vibrant colors of nature. The city bought the land to stop it from being destroyed by an out of state developer There is no good reason to get rid of the beauty of the land.

         The endeavor of a dog park occurred in other cities.  Dayton in Washington started to go through the approval process in 2017.  When they started the approval, “The site has already been graded and grass has been planted.”  This is very similar to Attleboro’s situation because the landscape doesn’t need a lot of work. There are a lot of tree, grass, and hills from the golf course.  One of Dayton’s biggest expenses is the fences and “about $3,500 is needed to buy and install the 780 feet of 4-foot-tall fencing.” Dayton is going through the process to build a dog park with a big expense like that.  However, the golf course already has a fence so Attleboro won’t have to build one. This is a large amount of money that won’t have to be paid. Dayton is doing really well with the process of the dog park, but Attleboro wouldn’t even have to do half of the work Dayton did.  It would be a lot less expensive while being just as effective. This is an opportunity Attleboro won’t always have and they should take advantage of it.

     Building a dog park in the heart of Attleboro would solve a lot of problems with some added benefits.  Neighbors of dogs won’t have to worry about their lawns being ruined and dog owners will be able to give their dogs space to run.  Also, owners won’t have to walk their dogs on the street where it can be dangerous. The dog park can help dogs to become friendlier and more active.  The owners of dogs will be able to connect with each other over their shared love of dogs. The benefits of the park are very valuable, but the opportunity Attleboro has is never going to come again.  The golf course the city bought would be perfect. The grass fills the area with color and the hills create a natural landscape. The property is already fenced in which is one less cost for the city. A new dog park would be extremely beneficial for Attleboro and now would be the perfect time to do it.  Building a new dog park would make Attleboro an even better place to live.

Works Cited

“Dog Park Benefits: How Barking for a Park Can Help You, Your Pet, and Your Community.” Cats 101: Basic Health & Care Tips to Keep Your Cat Healthy | PetSafe Articles, www.petsafe.net/learn/dog-park-benefits-how-barking-for-a-park-can-help-you-and-your-pet.


Ordway, Denise-Marie. “How Cities May Benefit from Dog Parks.” Journalist’s Resource, 27 July 2016, journalistsresource.org/studies/society/culture/how-cities-may-benefit-from-dog-parks.

Rhodes, George W. “Attleboro Mayor Seeks Volunteers for Committee on Highland Country Club.” The Sun Chronicle, 2 July 2018, www.thesunchronicle.com/news/local_news/attleboro-mayor-seeks-volunteers-for-committee-on-highland-country-club/article_60ea1ea5-3797-5ab0-95a7-42e215603f63.html.

Stockwell, Mark. “Our View: Keeping Highland Was Right Move.” The Sun Chronicle, 27 June 2018, www.thesunchronicle.com/opinion/our-view-keeping-highland-was-right-move/article_761b194b-1724-54da-bdf7-cf42c08f4f84.html.

 

Peer Review 3

     Overall, your sources are pretty good.  Your annotations do a good job at describing what the source is about.  I would just add in the annotations why the source is credible. I notice most of your sources were websites.  I would try to find some more articles or a book to use as a source. The format looks good. I noticed on sources two, three, four, and five there was no author.  Some of these I didn’t see an author but a few of them I did see an author on the website. Also, sources two and four had different cited dates then what I found on the websites.  I would go back and make sure all of the source’s information is accurate.

     Your report is organized pretty well.  I like how you split it up by each individual effect.  In terms of the information, it would help to go more in depth.  Adding more statistics and information found from studies. This would help to strengthen your report.  Also, you should go back to the prompt some more. The assignment talks about trying to convince a team or group of people to get funding for a new playground.  You should talk about this in your writing. It will help to improve your report. The in-text citations looked good. I would just change the citations for Ginsburg.  You used a dash, but you should use parentheses instead. You have a good rough draft. Making some changes to your annotated bib and report will really help to strengthen your piece.

 

Essay 2 Reflection

     After reading over the reviews I had gotten on Essay two, I started to revise.  My professor pointed out how awkward my first paragraph was so I started with that.  I changed most of the paragraph because it was choppy. I started with an introduction to the article and the assignment.  I kept the base of my thesis, but then added on. I added specific principles like the Invariant Right and the decompression zone in my thesis.  This gives the reader a better idea of what my paper will include.    

     I went through my writing and tried to cut back on any repetition I had.  Paragraph three where I talked about the Invariant Right had a lot of repetition.  I tried to take most of this repetition out. When looking for repetition, I also fixed up my word choice and sentence structure.  The revision page on style my professor recommended I look at talked about the passive voice. I read up on it and tried to take out the passive voice where it didn’t fit.  The style page also helped me with my word choice and taking away the repetition.

     Another revision I made was on descriptive verbs.  In my rough draft, I used a lot of “is” and “are”. I went through my writing and changed a lot of these descriptions.  Instead of saying, “snare stands are leaning,” I said, “snare stands leaned.” I feel this helped my writing flow a lot better.  Overall, I fixed up my choppy first paragraph and I adjusted my style of writing this essay.

 

Essay 2-Final Draft

Malcolm Gladwell wrote an article called, “The Science of Shopping”.  In the article, Gladwell writes about a man named Paco Underhill. Underhill uses science to study and observe how stores function (Gladwell).  As part of this assignment, I had to observe how a store functioned. I chose to observe Guitar Center. Guitar Center is a store that uses many of the principles that Underhill talks about.   Guitar Center uses strategies like the decompression zone, the Invariant Right, petting, and many more that are talked about by Paco Underhill (Gladwell). However, there were also ways the store operated differently than the article.  Underhill discussed principles like the four zones and a diverse customer base which Guitar Center doesn’t follow (Gladwell).

When first I walked into Guitar Center I noticed one thing right away.  The entrance had a few promotional signs, but there was no merchandise in the first 15 paces of the store.  This was a strategy Underhill had talked about. He called it the decompression zone and explained how it is the area of the store right when you walk in (Gladwell).  Nothing should be placed there because customers are going through the decompression factor and adjusting to the environment (Gladwell). Guitar Center did this really well because when I walked in I had enough time to adjust to the environment without being bombarded with products.  The empty floor space at the entrance gives customers time to observe and adjust to their surroundings.

 

After I was comfortable in the new environment, I noticed I was drawn towards the right of the store. There I found a wall that spanned the entire store with flashy new guitars and an abundance of drum sets that glistened in the studio lighting.  I realized this was another one of Underhill’s observations. It was Underhill’s principle of the Invariant Right (Gladwell). This is peoples instinct to take a right after entering the store (Gladwell). Even though I only glanced at the variety of guitars as I moved farther into the store,  they were definitely the centerpiece of the store. I was drawn towards the right where the most eye-catching products were. Their bright diverse colors created a rainbow of instruments. The shiny new merchandise was put where everyone could see it. This creates a great place for customers to start shopping at.

 

Guitar Center had an environment that I don’t see in many stores.  It was very comfortable and laid back. Throughout the store, there was a variety of instruments that customers were able to play and try out.  Most shoppers in the store sat down at least once and tried out one of the many instruments available. Also, all of the products were hung on shelves and walls that were easy to access.  Headphones were hung expertly on racks that can be listened to and cymbals were carefully stacked on the walls for easy access. This environment created the feeling of being over a friends house and trying out all of their cool instruments.  I felt comfortable while I was there and it wasn’t awkward. Underhill talks about creating an environment that represents a customers personality (Gladwell). It should showcase their products while making shoppers feel comfortable and like they belong there (Gladwell).

 

Guitar Center gives customers the option to try out instruments.  This demonstrates Underhill’s petting principle (Gladwell). Petting is the principle that when a shopper tries out a product they are more likely to buy it (Gladwell).  I witnessed a few shoppers try out an instrument and then go to buy it. In Guitar Center, a customer can try out almost any instrument. This gives them the opportunity to find the instrument the like best and to buy it.  Both a comfortable environment and the ability to try out instruments helps Guitar Center’s sales. From my observations, customers really enjoyed these aspects of Guitar Center. They tried out a lot of instruments and they relaxed in the environment.

 

When observing the clientele I noticed how the average shopper differed from what Underhill had observed.  He has said that purchasers spent around eleven minutes in the store and non-purchasers spent around two minutes (Gladwell).  In Guitar Center, I observed the opposite. A buyer would spend a quick five minutes in the store while a non-buyers would take their time and spend up to thirty minutes in the store.  Buyers seemed to know exactly what they needed going right to the product they wanted and then buying it. However, non-buyers took their time looking around and playing with obscure instruments that they had no intention of immediately buying.  I believe this clientele is the opposite of Underhill’s observation mainly because of the type of product being sold. A lot of people want to try out an instrument before they buy it. Being able to go in and just play instruments makes customers more likely to buy the instruments.  The customer can try out the instrument to make sure they like it.

 

Almost every worker in Guitar Center acts the same.  They casually stroll around the store and try to make conversation with shoppers.  They know everything that anyone would ever need know about music. They talk about all the new instruments, musicians, brands, and products.  According to Underhill, every one of them would be Market Mavens (Gladwell). Mavens are employees that know everything about all the products the store sells.  They go up to shoppers and initiate conversation (Gladwell). Mavens will tell the customers what they should buy (Gladwell). Every time I go to Guitar Center there is always at least one employee that comes up and talks to me.  Every conversation involves them asking me what instrument I play and bands I like. They ask about what kind of product I’m looking for. My answers always conveniently lead them to the most expensive and newest products they sell.  These employees all embody what it means to be a Maven. This helps the store sell a lot more products.

 

I walked around Guitar Center for awhile.  I paid a lot of attention to how the store was set up.  In Gladwell’s article, Underhill describes how every store has four main zones (Gladwell).  Zone one is in the front where the customer enters and zone four is the back where stores want customers to go (Gladwell).  In Guitar Center zone one was very bare with very little product for people to look at. Zone four in the way back is where all of the brand new drums and shiny new cymbals are.  For me as a drummer, I gravitate towards zone four. However, all of the other products are in zones two and three. This isn’t good according to Underhill because most customers won’t get to zone four.  The products are clearly sectioned off into drums, audio, guitars, and accessories. Audio is a narrow area almost like a hallway. Cables dangle from the wall boxes of headphones sit on the ground, scattered wherever there is space.  The guitar section is the biggest with a full wall of guitars and amplifiers stacked so high they act as small walls. The accessories section doesn’t take up a lot of real estate selling earplugs, guitar straps, instrument cases and other miscellaneous products.  This sectioned idea is great for finding products easily, but many people will overlook sections and miss a big chunk of their products. I observed that many shoppers were very narrow sighted just stayed in one section the whole time. This strategy is different than the article because Underhill talked about how stores should get customers to see as many products as possible (Gladwell).  The sectioned off layout makes Underhill’s strategy difficult. However, in Guitar Center, the sectioned areas work well because most people go to the store for a specific reason. A guitar player goes to the store for guitars. They wouldn’t want to look through all of the drum products just to find guitars.

 

Near the end of my observation, I noticed something.  The store had walls after wall of brand new guitars and every type of drums you can find stacked around the store.  They even had rack after rack of keyboards, but that’s all they had. There was no saxophones, trumpets, or flutes. Guitar Center only had drums, keyboards, and guitars.  This stood out to me because of something Underhill had talked about. He explained how stores should appeal to a certain type of customer, but not at the expense of other customers (Gladwell). Guitar Center has a customer base of musicians.  The store focuses on only three of the many instruments that exist. I have a lot of friends that play instruments like the trumpet tuba, clarinet, and even violin. None of these musicians go to Guitar Center because they don’t sell their instrument or accessories for it.   If Guitar Center sold more of a variety of instruments, they would get more customers into their stores.

 

Guitar Center positions their products in a very specific way.  The guitars sat right next to amplifiers and snare drums were displayed on a shelf that snare stands leaned up against.  The setup of cymbals was surrounded by cymbal bags and keyboards laid right next to racks headphones. These products were cleverly put next to each other because they would compliment each other well as products.  Underhill talked about how accessories like belts should go next to jeans and socks should go next to shoes (Gladwell). This increases the odds of a customer buying multiple items (Gladwell). Guitar Center did an excellent job a this because almost every product had another item next to it that could accompany it.  When you buy a guitar at Guitar Center you will be tempted to buy an amplifier with it because they would go so well together.

 

Guitar Center is just like any other store.  It is a company that wants to sell customers their products.  Many stores use principles that are written in “The Science Of Shopping” by Malcolm Gladwell.  In the article, Paco Underhill explains all of these principles (Gladwell). Guitar Center does an exceptional job taking advantages of the principles like the decompression zone, petting, the Invariant Right and many more that are talked about by Paco Underhill (Gladwell).  There are some places Guitar Center operates differently it with the zones and a diverse customer base (Gladwell). However, Guitar Center is really good at incorporating science into their store just like so many other stores. Science will always be a part of the shopping experience.



Works Cited

Gladwell, Malcolm. “The Science of Shopping.” The New Yorker 4 Nov. 1996, pp. 66-75.

Essay 3- The Importance Of Playgrounds

     Children should always be a priority.  They will soon be contributing to society and we need to make sure they are the best opportunity to be successful.  Playgrounds are something all kids love. If we utilize playgrounds, we can help kids learn various life skills. If we build and repurpose old playgrounds into new and more modernized zone playgrounds, children will learn faster.  They will grow up to have bigger and better accomplishments than us if we can jump-start their education. If we build more modern playgrounds we will be able to put our children in a position to have great accomplishments.

     Zoned playgrounds are different than regular playgrounds because of how it is set up.  The playground equipment is put into sections based on motor skills. One study split the sections into manuality, mobility, and balance.  The study discovered when children regularly attended the playground, they,“ improved significantly in four out of six gross motor tasks.”(Tortella 12) Zone style playgrounds worked for this study and if we build similar playgrounds children in our area will experience the same improvements.  This study was only conducted in one playground. If we built three, four, or five of these playgrounds, the improvement numbers would increase drastically.

     Zone playgrounds also increase children’s general physical activity.  When children are more active they become healthier. This helps to prevent them from any diseases or injuries that could hold the children back from completing their goal.  A study was conducted on how effective zone playgrounds were compared to traditional playgrounds. The study found that “children participating in very active behavior (V) increased on ZP versus TP by 10% .”(Barnas 129)  Ten percent might not seem like a lot, but if we can promote a zone style playground, ten percent can turn into a big number. If we built enough zone playgrounds for the whole city, we could get a majority of children to b very active.  Higher activity will make children healthier and happier.

     Zone playgrounds are the best option for the types of a playground and they come with their own benefits.  However, there are some effects that any type of playground has on children. Some researchers have observed these benefits by using a social-ecological model.  This model “explores(ing) the multiple levels of influence [and] provides a useful framework for understanding it.”(Hyndman 327) The social-ecological model helped to determine that influences like intrapersonal, interpersonal, and the environment have effects on children. (Hyndman)  Building more playgrounds in the city would help children engage in more vigorous activity, improve social interactions, and increase awareness of their surroundings. The effects of playgrounds are overwhelming and we should take the opportunity to build more playgrounds around the city.

     Sedentary time in children is very important.  Children should be up and move as much as possible.  The sedentary time when children aren’t being active should be low.  Playgrounds have been found to help sedentary time and this makes sense because kids like to run around in playgrounds.  One study observed children and their sedentary time. Researchers found that “the intervention [of playgrounds] was effective in displacing sedentary time in younger children.”(Hamer 6)  This decrease in sedentary time is just one of the effects playgrounds have on children. We need to build more playgrounds in order to have these effects on children. More playgrounds will help our children learn more life skills and become healthier.  This will help them to accomplish more in life than our generation could.    

     Another big effect playgrounds help children improve is their mental complexity.  Playgrounds can help children to prepare for how to handle real-life situations. When playing in a playground, “the kids themselves have to negotiate, well, what are we going to do in this game? What are the rules we are going to follow? (Pellis)  Situations like these prepare children for future events. It teaches them how to communicate, cooperate, and compromise. Building more playgrounds will help teach children these valuable life lessons. If we build more playgrounds, children will be more ready to face the challenges of the future.

     Children are the future of society.  We need to actively teach and guide them so they can be successful.  Playgrounds are places children love and they have been proven to help children in many ways.  We need our city to build zone playgrounds around the area to help the cities children. The zone playgrounds have been proven to have the most beneficial effects on children.  The future of our society depends on the children so we must give them every resource possible to be successful. This success can start with a modern zoned playground.


 Works Cited

Motor Skill Development in Italian Pre-School Children Induced by Structured Activities in a Specific Playground.

Tortella, Patrizia, et al. “Motor Skill Development in Italian Pre-School Children Induced by Structured Activities in a Specific Playground.” Plos ONE, vol. 11, no. 7, 27 July 2016, pp. 1-15. EBSCOhost, doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0160244.

This article is about a study done on children at the “La Ghirada” sports Center in Italy.  The study focused on observing how children’s motor skills improved in the zoned style playground.  The study found that the playground improved the majority of motor skills for children. This source is credible because it is a recent study and the writer conducted their own research.  The information isn’t incorrect or changed because it is the study was conducted by the author.



Exploring the Influences on Children’s School Playground Activities.

Hyndman, Brendon, et al. “Exploring the Influences on Children’s School Playground Activities.” American Journal of Play, vol. 8, no. 3, Spring2016, pp. 325-344. EBSCOhost

This article explores how the social-ecological model influences children’s playground activities.  It explores how different influences can affects children’s activity. They found if the interpersonal influences and physical environments are healthy and plentiful, children will be more active in playgrounds.  This source is credible because it used a lot of different references. All the references used in this article help to make sure the information is correct because some references will backup the other references.

 

Effect of major school playground reconstruction on physical activity and sedentary behaviour: Camden active spaces.  

Hamer, Mark, et al. “Effect of Major School Playground Reconstruction on Physical Activity and Sedentary Behaviour: Camden Active Spaces.” BMC Public Health, vol. 17, 07 June 2017, pp. 1-8. EBSCOhost, doi:10.1186/s12889-017-4483-5

This journal article is about a study on children’s physical activities.  There were seven total schools in the study that were observed. The findings of the study were that playgrounds don’t make a big difference in physical activity, but they do decrease sedentary time in smaller children.  This source is credible because it is based on the author’s observations. It doesn’t just state factual evidence. The source also uses references to compare its work to and to see if their work was similar to others.

 

In the Zone: An Investigation Into Physical Activity During Recess on Traditional Versus Zoned Playgrounds.

Barnas, Jillian, et al. “In the Zone: An Investigation into Physical Activity during Recess on Traditional Versus Zoned Playgrounds.” Physical Educator, vol. 75, no. 1, Jan. 2018, pp. 116-137. EBSCOhost, doi:10.18666/TPE-2018-V75-I1-7594.

This article observes if a zoned playground worked better than a traditional playground.  The study collects its on data to come to its conclusions. It concludes that both playgrounds are effective, but zoned playgrounds are more effective.  This source is credible because it collects its own data and then compares it to other data. The source acknowledges its limitations and uses references to back up the conclusions even more.

 

Scientists Say Child’s Play Helps Build A Better Brain

Hamilton, Jon, and Sergio Pellis. “Scientists Say Child’s Play Helps Build A Better Brain.” NPR, NPR, 6 Aug. 2014, www.npr.org/sections/ed/2014/08/06/336361277/scientists-say-childs-play-helps-build-a-better-brain.

This source is a website with a news article on playgrounds.  The article talks about a scientist and all the research he has done on the topic.  He has found free play activities like playgrounds help children develop complex social interactions and other skills.  This source is credible because it is a news source talking to a scientists. Both parties have no bias towards playgrounds because they are just trying to find or convey observations.